My Mama

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  • #253235
     Nichole
    Participant

    LKT,  how did it go??

    #252905

    Mama Anita will likely (fingers crossed!) be discharged from the hospital today! One of three doctors who need to approve this, already has, we are just waiting on the other two.

    The CT scan revealed the good news that the cancer is only in her bone marrow, and HAS NOT spread to the lymphnodes. Phew.

    #250172
     Nichole
    Participant

    “I have almost NO experience with this and I’m not sure how best to support them and myself through this.”

    This sentence made me smile. LKT, of course you don’t have experience with this! And thank goodness you don’t. I wish nobody had experience with this because if you do, that means you’ve been through it and I’m sure it’s no fun. LKT, you are doing all the right things. Not that you need me to tell you that, and not like I know what I’m talking about, but what I mean is that you just being you and being willing to support (and get supported), and being willing to not know how but bring your big beautiful heart to your family and your mom and allow us to support you in that… it’s all perfect.

    I’m so sorry you’re going through this. We are super here for whatever you need. I am available on Friday at 8:00 a.m., but sounds like Sabs has you already. Pencil me in for next week?

    #250147
     Sabrina Pratt
    Participant

    Hi Laura!!! I love you so much. I’ve got your back. I am available for support 24/7. I am also available Friday at 9am.

    You’re wonderful, strong, capable, brilliant and you will weather this “storm.” My Mom has lived through cancer. It was (and is) terrifying. Gut wrenching. And- During that time just a few years ago we also embraced each other more fully and created so much connection between my Mom & I and my whole family.

    I have some resources for you including someone who could be the doula you’re looking for. She is a clinical therapist AND a professional life doula who supports families in embracing experiences and transitions together. I am happy to share whenever you would like. Please just let me know when (and how) would be best to share resources so as not to contribute to the flood of info. I hear you on the feeling overwhelmed part. I love you. Call me anytime!!!!!

    #250135

    Hey Team, My mom has her first chemo treatment today, and again tomorrow. My sister, brother in law, and nephew moved back to the east coast in early June because my brother in law got a job in DC. They intended on staying with my mom in NJ until they find a house they want to buy in the DC area – they didn’t plan on moving in with her to become her cancer care team. My sister is an amazing get shit doner and I trust my mom is in the best care with Nadia, but Nadia is scared and overwhelmed with a 14 month old too – and my mom doesn’t share her anxiety and fear out loud too much.

    I have almost NO experience with this and I’m not sure how best to support them and myself through this. The blood cancer is a rare form that we don’t fully understand all the ins and outs of – and then there’s all the stuff surrounding it like healthcare expenses and insurance BS and I see my role from afar can look like standing for both my mom and Nadia to get the birth doula equivalent of holistic care through cancer care.

    Britt put me in touch with her mom, who I am connecting with this week and who has some experience and insight regarding wellness, health, and blood cancer stuff. Where else would you point me, are there great resources you know about for caregivers patients through and beyond chemo?

    My default is going to be that I don’t need anything, that they’re fine and don’t need my support, and that I can’t make a difference. I want to be present and partnered with them through this, but I fear that my breakdowns in owning my overwhelm and getting support are going to get in the way.

    I could use a support call a week about my mom and to look at who I’m going to be for her, Nadia, my family, and myself and what needs my attention. Who is available this week on Friday morning between 6-10am Pacific Time?

    Thanks in advance.

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