10 months, 1 week ago #229168NicholeParticipant
Lesa: Have something you want to do (usually a connection). Puts time limits on it and then never does it and then feels bad. So just don’t do it and then hide. Then I don’t connect at all. Connecting with others is predictable area.
Steve: Distract self, feel angry and choose not to do something, choose not to do it now, it’s my creation so I’ll do it when I want. Recycling patter. “I’ll do it when I want” let’s me off the hook. Having uncomfortable conversations is predictable area. Social situations, friends.
Andrew: I know it’s bad for me. I don’t want to but then I have belief that it’s necessary. If I do something bad and I don’t sabotage then I’ll move forward. I need it to stop myself from moving forward.
What can one do to get out in front of it?
Lauren: Back to being practices before we’re out of being
Lesa: Just do it. Missing accountability.
Britt: What structures would you put in?
Lesa: Reminding me of the What For – someone else + visual display
Britt: Want to ask team for support?
Lesa: No don’t know what to ask for.
Vicky: SS pattern came up yesterday during SM test. Got nervous, went to worst case scenario, beat myself up, took myself out. It didn’t have as much on me because I was able to see it. Texted Cailin. Then I wasn’t in it anymore. So, texting a friend and having a conversation with it.
“You can’t measure a room with no walls.”
Vicky: Too busy
Steve: Uncomfortable in the unknown
Nancy: Clear cycle of self sabotage. Self sabotage is waiting to come in. On edge, why me, etc.
Nancy: My promises are always meant to be broken by me. Not even going to make the promise. When it comes to others going to manipulate it and do it. The vision is the truth.
Steve: I like to think that I keep my word, but I don’t have any structure around that. I rely on memory. I also notice what gets in the way of making promises of not doing something I don’t want to do, which gets in the way of holding other people to it. I don’t want to push them on something I’m not willing to do.
Sarah: Reminded of childhood, negotiations. If you be good or do this thing, I’ll reward you, etc. Last Word on Power – Reinvention paradigm is a series of making bold requests and promises and adjusting as you move forward. Promise and then if you can’t keep it, adjust and pivot from there.
Vicky: Only promise things you know you can do to avoid disappointing anyone
Lesa: My stuff came up by the time I got to number 10. In my head I don’t expect other people to come through on their promises because I’ve had that experience. SO I don’t want to make promises or I’ll let someone down. I don’t hold them to it relates to my own worth.
Lauren: Promises as a kid had a lot of importance and then when you learn people don’t care about promises they made to you, deflated importance.
Ryan Mac: Having promises broken. I use promises sparingly. Having them broken is hurtful. SM to not make promises. Power: Strength and resilience in any circumstance.
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